You are such a good girl.

I just came back from work and I’m trying to rub two brain cells together to scramble and make a post for Sunday. It was a difficult day. We were heavily understaffed and patients came in such numbers we it was a Black Friday sale in ED. Still despite my registrar calling in sick, I managed to hold the department together.

The revolving doors were swinging, bringing more and more patients. Together with my junior doctors, we tried to process them all and, taking the lion share of the presentations, I stumbled on this one gentleman. Older, proper English gent, and very talkative. My experience says if you let patient talk for long enough, then somewhere within the verbal deluge you will pick out that vital clue that will help you diagnose their illness. So I let him talk and it didn’t take me long to find the answer to his complaint and once I retrieved his test results I arranged for his safe discharge. And that’s when he got me. As I was giving him the paper copy of his discharge notes, the man, without malicious intent said…

‘Good girl, so efficient.’

Yup, me, a 40 odd year old Emergency Medicine consultant, was called a good girl, and I bet I was just one inch away from being patted on the top of the head. It was so inappropriate and borderline offensive that I could only laugh it off.

I know that in the world these days, there is a trend of name and shame and taking offence to everything that makes you feel uncomfortable, and yes, his words made me feel awkward as fuck, but for me as a doctor and author, it is the intention that matters. If someone wants to cause offence, especially if they are intelligent, they can find polite words to express their disdain. Still, more often than not, you meet people with no social graces, whose awkward attempts at compliments make you cringe, and those I just laugh off.

Life is simply too short for being a fragile butterfly, whose wings lose their shine under a gentle touch.

As you can see, I’m a good girl, with just a little naughty streak, so when something makes me cringe I simply write about it.

One wet nipple 🤣

I have no idea what get into us to go to the town in the very rainy Saturday morning. The rain wasn’t just falling, it was pouring but when you live in Cornwall you know this won’t discourage people from going shopping.

While we were strolling between other soggy looking people Mark got the idea that since it is Black Friday weekend why not check if electronic shops haven’t got any intersting deal. After all we had to think about Christmas presents and such. We were already loaded with other shopping bags and although I could manouver my umbrella without hitting to many people’s in the face I was unable to cover much taller Mark and he resorted to trust his rainproof coat.

So we went to the shop and while I was browsing the merchandise Mark went to chat with the salesman and to sign the deal on the product we wanted. The shop was hot so he proceed to remove his coat and suddenly I heard the dialogue.

‘I have wet nipple? Why I have only one nipple wet?’

Yup it was my man, looking at his jumper and large wet patch around his left peck. Completely oblivious he directed this question to mortified clerk. The cha looked at him, than looked at me and blurted out.

‘Maybe because one is always bigger?’

I really thought I will piss myself laughing there. The man got the deal and whole shop got the entertainement from my delisiously inapropriate man’s question why his waterpoof coat didn’t protect his nipple.

I think he will be forever known between the mobile phone sellers as

“The nipple man.”

Should I follow this heartfelt advice?

The reality of author’s life, and what you can find in your email box.

There is a grain of truth in this random unsolicited email. The authors big and small strive for review. Review means validation for our craft, feedback from the reader that can make or break your day. Finally the sales. And sales matters.

If you want to give your readers a decent book. One with cover that catches the eye. Sentences that are cleared from clunkiness and make sence in the long run. When you want the plot holes to be plugged and you struggle with oxford coma you need to invest in the book and hope that in the long run it will pay off.

Reviews buy the book. Potential reader check the blurb than scrolls down to see what others think about it and that influence their decision to buy a book so authors, ask and brag with ARC and giveaway to have the reviews.

So as I said there is a grain of truth in this email but no self respecting author will pay for the reviews, and after a good giggle I moved this angry buisness proposal to the spam box.

And speaking of giveaways… Christmas is coming and we would like to celebrate with you so here it comes. Our nevest giveaway. Sign up and enjoy.

Writer’s news and Netflix recommendations

Yesterday I added another 2000 words to our third book that I started to call the never ending story. I planned it on 95k as the rest of my books in the Season’s war series, but this book just keep on giving and I’ve already crossed this threshold and still have at least three chapters to write. It looks like our Spring Blight have so many plot threads it will take a moment to tie them up.

We put Winter Dragon on NetGalley, and I admit I did it with a slight tremble as I heard readers there can be quite harsh but hey we got a 5 stars there and our very first Winter Dragon Review that says:

So, celebrating and to give myself a bit of rest before I will brace with the next chapter tomorrow, I decided to watch “1899” on Netflix. It dragged us in, but what a bonkers series it is. I can recommend it to you as a mind-boggling experience. Nothing is as it seems or as it supposed to be and although we were a little sceptic at the beginning, the series dragged us in and we bonged on all 8 episodes overnight. But I won’t give you any spoilers. Just watch it if you can.

Now, you have the post published in the middle of the night UK time, because I’m wide awake and cuddling with cats.

Cats and writing 😁

My cats are peculiar when comes to my writing. I have a favourite position. with laptop on the extendable table and cross legged. Somehow it suits me the most but so it does to my cats.

Especially my girl Zuza treats my writing position as esclusive invitation to cuddle and somehow she always picks the moment when I’m engrossed in writing some particular intense battle scene. The more focused I am the more persistent she is to flop on my lap and stretch herself all over the keyboard.

Rokita is no better but this little devil always come here and bother me because he knows in order to get him out of my lap he is getting his Thirve treats.

He is a big boy and loves his snacks so he pushing his big furry arse here quite often especially when I write sex scenes.

I guess everyone of them has their own little specialty. So if I have any delay in publishing third book now you know why.

When you forget you also have a doctor career 🤣

Yup, I forgot I am a speaker in the international congress

Writing takes most of my non clinical time lately and I think I found my secodn call in life, but being so engrossed in writing the stories I tend to forget one important thing. I’m also a doctor.

Sometime ago I was asked to be a speaker in the International Emergency Congress in Antlaya. We were very excited about it especially that it was around Mark’s birthday and I was hoping we could send some nice “couple” time there. Life got in the way and we couldn’t fly there as we coldn’t find a suitable catsitter for the time.

AND I FORGOT ABOUT IT

till few days ago I didn’t get a message from the organisers ‘are you coming?’ I shit you not in a hope we could fly there I forgot to cancel my appearance and to make matter worse, I compleatly forgot about it. I had no presentation, and I was expected to give a lecture on the Ultrasound in Resuscitation. So I spend last few days preparing the slides for the hybrid/zoom appearance only to learn due to time zone difference my presentation is at 5:30am.

I am a proper zombie at this time of night, so the next step was to pre-record the presentation because slurred speech and yawning might not be best recieved. Any way today I woke up at ungodly hour of 5am put my best jumper over my pijama and apply any online filter I could find to look more like a human being and played my presentation in front of massive conference audience.

It was so well recieved that the chairman forgot to mark the timing and I exceed my alocated time frame. I won this one in a proper ED style.

Tired, sleepy and under preassure on the night shift.

😋

Celebrating Movember with humor – Mark’s take on man’s health

With a birthday coming up this week, my body decided now would be a good time to tell me that I need to stop pretending I’m twenty one. How? You might ask.

Well, as a fairly active man I have a reasonably fit body and a little dad bod tummy that I’m sneakily proud of, yes this is a weird household, don’t ask. However these last few weeks that cute little paunch has been growing, and now I appear to be approximately six months pregnant, which would be a miracle given my age, and the fact that I’m a white middle aged man.


So off to the GP I toodle. For those that don’t know, Olga is a consultant in the NHS and during her working day often trains the junior doctors that are on rotation in her department. Rotation is the system all new doctors go through in order to learn about all the disciplines and determine where they want to work in the future.


You may be wondering why this is relevant and it wouldn’t be if it wasn’t for the fact that my new GP is or rather was, one of Olga’s protégés, from the hospital, a young lady that instantly recognised me, and, after going over my symptoms determined I needed a few tests. This included blood, stool, urine samples and, the ever embarrassing finger up the bum.


First thing I’ll say is I’m not easily embarrassed, and the second is that the poor doctor was professional and did everything according to the guidelines, neither of us looking at each other entirely in the eye. The guidelines however meant that we needed a chaperone, and as I said not easily embarrassed old git here. So my GP nips out and grabs another doctor to join us.


In walks the chaperone, this time its not just one of Olga’s female protégés, but one I know personally and that we’d actually socialised with. Queue the awkward hi how are you etc. Then me turning around, climbing on the trolley and exposing myself to a personal friend whilst the othe acquaintance rifled through my insides.


Needless to say the proceedings were wrapped up very quickly after that and now I await my results and am keeping my fingers crossed.

Snippet time – this time from Spring Blight third book in the series.

Plus bonus illustration from Winter Dragon (pre-order HERE 😋)

Everyone was already there when she entered Rewan’s office, but to her surprise, the king looked anxious. It was rather odd, as he kept a straight face in the direst of circumstances. Mar and Kaian had already dived into military strategy, evaluating it from every angle, and she could not help but smile, seeing how their minds synchronised regarding military matters.

Mar wanted to incorporate were-people into the king’s guards, especially in the role of the sentinels. Ina had to admit it was an excellent idea. Their heightened senses could provide invaluable intel and an additional level of protection, but Kaian didn’t seem convinced. Was that the reason she was called?

‘Ina, I’m glad you’re here.’ Rewan noticed her first. She smiled and settled on the windowsill’s pillow, looking at the gathering. She saw Kaian stop his conversation and move to the king, placing a hand on his shoulder in a reassuring gesture.

‘So, what catastrophe are we dealing with now?’

Her light tone and playful wink were meant to relieve the tension, but she saw Rewan pale and his advisor’s fingers tightened on the king’s shoulder.

‘Oh, for fuck’s sake, just tell me.’ Ina said, jumping down and approaching the king. ‘You are not dying or something?’ She grabbed Rewan’s chin and tilted his head, looking for concerning signs. The tension burst and Rewan pulled back with a brief chuckle.

‘No, I’m not dying. I’m thinking of getting married.’

’tis Amazon malarky gave me an ulcer.

Yesterday was a day when I use all anti reflux medications we have at home. Had panic attack, meltdown, rage fit and cold overhelming fury … right before I sorted the issue.

So what happen. Well, indie authors knows the pleasure to publish via the Amazon KDP. It is easy, it is handly it opens you up on the great market. It is also automatic soulless machine that treat you like guilty untill proven innocent. As I was writing our third book yesterday suddenly my email box pinqued and I saw the email all authors dread to see.

It has come to our attention that the following book(s) may include one or more images on your book’s cover for which you may not have the necessary rights:

Amazon KDP Team

And I lost my shit… because they made our ebook unavailable for the sale without the warning just snapping the fingers. I would understand the situation where I get an email asking me to prove the licence otherwise in 5 days they will make the book unavailable but no out of the blue ebook of AUTUMN CHAOS was out of the market.

One I calmed my racing heart and drunk enough Gaviscon to tame the raging sea I dug to the licence folder where I was holding everything including the copyright certificate from U.S. goverment. Everybody told you that you don’t need it when you start to look for the copyright advice that just by being an author you are protected.

Yeah … right. If you are an author shift your rear end pay few pennies and get certificate and get one because I’m pretty sure it saved me.

The thing is I have everything as legal as it can be. Invoices for services, acknowleage cover designer and licences for images. So I piled it all up and threw into Amazon quoting the licensing laws and all that jazz fretting because out main sales are in ebooks and loosing them we fall right down onto the bottom of the visibility.

24h later I got an email back. The ebook was restored and is back on sales, and our book positively verified it’s legitimacy both of writing and cover design. But I lost our good ranking position and now will have to dig the book out of the hole it droped because of day with no sales.

But despite almost exploding an ulcer I won this battle and my baby is back on the shelves, all because as a proper control freak Virgo I had all licences and copyright certification ready so if you every decide to go indie path keep all the papers safe. That is my advice to you.

Goodreads Giveaway between 01-13/11/22

Goodreads Book Giveaway

Autumn Chaos by Olena Nikitin

Autumn Chaos

by Olena Nikitin

Giveaway ends November 13, 2022.

See the giveaway details at Goodreads.

Enter Giveaway

I intended to post something smart today but my brain resembles melted jello after last night’s Emergency Department Halloween shift

So I will keep it short and sweet. We are having Goodreads giveaway.

Enter, claim the book and let us know what you think about it.

… and I’m off to bed before round two with drunk celebrating corwd tonight.

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