How we “ACCIDENTALLY” gifted lube for Christmas

Food, cosmetics, gifts, clothing, you name it; we did it.

Now, here’s the thing. Being an over-40 perimenopausal woman, I need a bit of support to keep “the undercarriage” in good shape. Yup, you guessed right, but let me tell you that getting older doesn’t mean you have to give up on the pleasurable things in your life, so here you have us buying a supply of fancy lube whilst doing all the Christmas shopping.

Come today, and we woke up in a frisky mood. To ensure he didn’t cause irreparable damage with his affection, Mark went in search of our latest purchase.

Nope, nothing, nada… we couldn’t find it anywhere. I mean frisky mood was gone, bathroom cabinets wrecked looking for the damn thing, but no, it was like the bottle sank into the bottom of the ocean.

Suddenly, I got a flash of insight. I bought my teenage stepdaughter a skincare set from Clinique, together with a few other make-up items in the same shop we bought the lube.

‘Mark, I think we need to check the kiddo’s gift bag.’ I said, and he looked at me with a question in his eyes. ‘I think we packed lube as a Christmas gift.’

We ran downstairs like the wind, and guess what? There it was, between the fluffy jumper and skin care set, was a “spice up your life” bottle of intimate moisturiser.

Now, imagine me trying to explain to a 15-year-old that Santa had a moment of stupidity, and we are not encouraging her to exploit this part of her personality.

Crisis averted, but … damn, it was close.