The dread of the Newsletter

Yup, it is almost perverse how a large mailing list makes you feel like a ‘real’ author. We brag about it, we brag about the opening ratio and we do our best to satisfy our readers with newsletter content. And then there’s me. The woman who always knows how to fuck shit up with her newsletters.

I’m computer savy, I’m good with aesthetics and yet there is always something not working. Whether it is a link to a picture or, as in the last case, the giveaway. I check it several times, do the previews and send a test email but each morning I wake up after sending the newsletter there is this sense of dread, and the question.

What did I fuck up this time?

I don’t know how other authors do it. Maybe they do exactly the same, and dread it the same way I do? They seem to build such a large following on social media, a huge mailing list and ARC lists with readers who actually review the book. – For me however, it’s a struggle. I have no social graces and I’m the awkward bunny that wants to do well but doesn’t quite manage.

I know, I know, I’m whining, but writing became such important part of my life and yet after a year I still find myself lacking. I’m proud of my writing but my marketing… it sucks, big time. And sometimes I just need to vent about it. So you heard me. Now, I think I will go bang my head on the kitchen table a few times before putting on my big girl pants and scrambling to prepare another newsletter.