Categories: Humor

A bit of (in-)sane thoughts 😋

I have a bit of home sitting A/L so I reverted to my owlish lifestyle and reserved the night for most of my activities and thinking. Yesterday laying in bed with Mark I was in a very philosophical mood and while I had deep existential thoughts I finally told him.

“I think one night my boobs will choke me to death, you should engineer some anti-gravity chamber so I can sleep”

Mark looked at me with a long pause and finally stated.”No, we just need a big magnet”

???

” hmmmm….” I’ve answered intelligently trying to imagine why magnet, so on the wave of Nobel prize discovery he explained

” magnets can hold this Japanese train, so we just need the big one under the mattress and we will paint your tits with magnetic paint and they will hover” yup, that’s my man, master of hovering tits. Nothing to add.

Leaving anatomy of my body ( as you can see there was no chance for any help from this man) I drifted to … ancient China. I must have been watching too many Chinese dramas lately. ( current one is “The Rebel Princess”- really good!)

” I would be a great Empress” I’ve stated, expecting that as an intelligent man with self-preservation skills, he will agree. And so he did, just not as I expected.

“Yeah, you are bloodthirsty enough” He stated without the shade of doubt.

“I’m not bloodthirsty, I strongly refrain from killing people” I rebutted his obvious lie and he had the cheek to add:

“sure, but you make them suffer if they cross you” he answered with glee. I was really offended, but I decided to give him another chance.

“it’s not true and you know it, I have a mild and amiable temper”

… and this fecker dare to laugh, in my bed, rolling and laughing like crazy to tears.

So I beat him. There is only as much a woman can take, and when I was in this pseudo-domestic violence fury slapping his ass, he was laughing even harder gasping in between breaths

“this just proves my point”

I was so done with philosophy, he doesn’t deserve my illustrious thoughts.

*Disclaimer

no man was permanently damaged during this encounter, I even preserved his ego.

Olena Nikitin

Olena Nikitin is the pen name of a writing power couple, Olga and Mark, who share a love of fantasy, paranormal romance, rich vivid worlds and exciting storylines. In their books and out, they love down-to-earth humour, a visceral approach to life, striving to write realistic romances filled with the passion and steam people always dream of experiencing.

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Olena Nikitin

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